Dear friends, colleagues, associates, and admirers. I, Cat Reporter, have been chosen for the arduous task of infiltrating the NDP leadership convention for this fine internet periodical in order to bring you the Cat Truth. I do not take this assignment lightly, as the NDP threatens the very foundations of a free and united Canada.

You may find yourself asking "who is this NDP, and why should they threaten me?" Until very recently, the NDP has been a fringe group of radicals, known for occasionally electing a Member of Parliament. They like to claim responsibility for some of the most horrific and devastating public policy decisions in Canadian history, such as the socializing of medicine, or the Canadarm.