couple of great articles, and a must read for men on the forum.
http://www.alternet.org/reproductivejustice/147779/5_things_society_unfa...
http://www.alternet.org/reproductivejustice/147626/5_stupid%2C_unfair_an...
5 things society unfairly expects of men
Tue, 2010-08-10 20:28
#1
5 things society unfairly expects of men
Tue, 2010-08-10 21:51
#2
It's basic social practice as a man to never be seen doing anything you're not good at. For example, if a workplace has a softball team, it's ok for the women to have never played softball and not hit the ball often, it's not ok for the men.
A few of those things in that list are not specific to men, or not really. For example being "strong"... it's about as hard for a man to be buff as it is for a woman to be slim.
thanks for the post milo.
Tue, 2010-08-10 22:18
#3
I dunno, I thought those ten things were fairly obvious clichés. I like the point about not being seen doing something you're not good at, though. I never really thought about that one before, although it's been lurking in my consciousness.
Wed, 2010-08-11 13:33
#4
I've known I don't fit into traditional male roles since I was about, maybe, 6, when I started hanging out with the girls much more than the boys. My best friend was always male, but that was about it. Being from a small town, this failure to be good at, or even interested in, typical male roles quickly brought my sexual orientation into question by people my own age, my parents, and for a brief time myself. I've come to realize it has nothing to do with sexual preference (I'm boringly straight), but just that I don't fit current society's model of what it is to be male. But I've had lots of years to become okay with that. But is that sexism? Hell no. I've never encountered any time of discrimination, systemic or individual, just because I'm not a typical "guy". I can buck as many stereotypes as I like and still go far and be judged mostly on my abilities. Women are discriminated against even when they do conform to unrealistic societal stereotypes; a woman who tries to get ahead while refusing to conform will have it much harder than I'll ever know.
Wed, 2010-08-11 16:30
#5
good point weltschmerz. i'm the same way, never paid much attention to "being a man" and my life has been fine, but then again i also don't hang out with many "manly" men. i remember being younger and having stretched earlobes and working at a suburban future shop, and some of my co workers asked if i was a "faggot" just because i had metal in my ears...
Wed, 2010-08-11 18:51
#6
remind
Funny and who is the "society" that is imposing these expectations upon men?
And really, we all know men are so hard done by.....gosh darn it anyhow, when will they ever receive the fairness they are due?
Wed, 2010-08-11 22:39
#7
Funny and who is the "society" that is imposing these expectations upon men?
I think all of us are imposing, or reflecting, our expectations on each other.
I'd love to hear how you'd answer this question though.
Thu, 2010-08-12 01:39
#8
Always hitting inside the bowl...
Thu, 2010-08-12 02:02
#9
I like being a dude and doing some of the cliche things expected of being a guy.
I can fix things, be strong, fight, play a sport or two, not cry in public, be expected to ask a girl out and pay for the bill, wrestle or punch another guy instead of hugging, make bad sexist jokes and laugh, make girls mad at me when I tease them, make a mess when eating, throw my clothing on the ground, be dirty and unkempt, watch to much porn and know some for the stars by name, amke fun of all the other guys around me, say dumb things at the wrong time, own a gun at one time in my life, work on my car (and hate it of course), have tools, show off my scars, be wearing the same shirt as someone else and then going up to them and saying "hey man nice shirt, you got great taste".
Ya I could go on...cliches? Bringum on...
Thu, 2010-08-12 18:33
#10
remind, always with the timely and insightful remark.
it's not like talking about this diminishes or takes away from the struggle against patriarchy, actually it helps it by helping men reject the basic tenets of sexism by not playing along. Isn't changing mens attitudes and behavior essentially the way to combat sexism. like rape, it wouldn't happen if we didn't do it.
Thu, 2010-08-12 20:39
#11
Totally agree with you milo. Apparently there is a little bit of a man led feminist movement working towards the goals you stated above.
Thu, 2010-08-12 20:48
#12
as there should be! i think it's our responsibility as males to call other men on their sexist BS. and since we're part of the problem, we should shoulder some of the responsibility for helping to get rid it!
Thu, 2010-08-12 21:40
#13
RevolutionPlease
Totally agree with you milo. Apparently there is a little bit of a man led feminist movement working towards the goals you stated above.
[img]http://www.jlh-design.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/simpsons_nelson_hah...
If that wasn't tongue in cheek, I'd be shocked. Are you trolling SG? :)-
And milo, darn right we should. Listening for direction is the first step.