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right wing and lookism

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martin dufresne
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Joined: Dec 24 2005
November 28, 2008 - 4:10pm
#31

A personal anecdote along the "mind's eye" research. I am the "Quand j'aime une fois j'aime pour toujours" kind of guy. For better or worse, I keep a quiet flame going for people I have been very close to. One such female friend has really not aged well for all kinds of heavy reasons - chronic occupational disease, alcohol, divorce, mental problems, dysfunctional family issues... I used to come around to her city once or twice a year: we'd make small talk, go for ahike, go out, buy a record, have dinner, share news of our kids and families.

Now, every time I arrived at her place, I would think: "Oh my God, I can't believe how much she has aged and looks sad." But over the next half-hour or so, even when conversation was tense - I tend to argue more than listen very long and we entirely disagree on most issues -, I would stop seeing the age and the bitterness and see her as she was when we were 20 and crazy. I don't know if she felt this and actually gained any of the confidence I felt she gradually showed as a result of what was an unconscious process on my part . But it was a pretty nifty bit of magick to seemingly turn back the clock on life, if for a few hours...


thorin_bane
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Joined: Jun 19 2004
November 28, 2008 - 4:24pm
#32

There is a google video called  SECRET OF THE SEXES and they conducted tests with in love and out of love couples. They had them look at modified photos to see if they could pick out which was the closest to how their spouse looked. As you can imagine the in love couples thought the best looking picture(etter than the real one) was how their partner looked. While the opposite was true of those having difficulties.  

 

______________________________________________________________________________________ "Everybody's worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there's a really easy way: stop participating in it." Noam Chomsky


500_Apples
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Joined: Jun 3 2006
November 28, 2008 - 5:24pm
#33
torontoprofessor wrote:

From the ages of 17 to 21, I worked at a day camp, where we had kids aged 4 to 10. I was dismayed, though not surprised, at just how much more attention and praise the good-looking kids got from the counsellors, even (indeed, especially) at the age of 4 or 5. I made a point of paying special attention to the less cute more homely kids, partly because it was heartbreaking to see them so routinely ignored (and almost never gushed over). I hate to confess that doing this took some effort: the path of least resistance would have been to gush over the cute ones like everyone else.

You're an exceptional person.

500_Apples
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Joined: Jun 3 2006
November 28, 2008 - 5:39pm
#34
lagatta wrote:
Average height in the US seems to have declined, and no, it is not because of immigration from Mexico and Central America. It seems this is an equality and social development issue, although of course genetics does play a part too.
Do they eat more vegetables in the Netherlands?

500_Apples
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Joined: Jun 3 2006
November 28, 2008 - 5:41pm
#35
remind wrote:
Malcolm wrote:
I don't know what it says about "lookism" in our society - or about me - but in my mind I had never pictured remind as either tall or blond.

Curious how one creates an image of what an anonymous correspondent looks like.

Surprised

Well now, I am not tall, 5'7" is not tall per se, it is about average.

And these days the blonde is liberally chunked with pure white, though it is long and wavy. Downright curly if I am on the coast. My daughter and granddaughter think I look like a sorceress. Perhaps the look comes natually with the territory? Wink

And lagatta, I always wanted to be diminuative with dark hair, and the curls could stay!

Will refrain from asking malcolm how he visualied me. :eek:

___________________________________________________________ "watching the tide roll away"

Average height for a woman is 5"4... I never get why people always overestimate the average height of women. Must be the shoes. I never see anyone get far off from 5"10 as the average height for men.

lagatta
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Joined: Apr 17 2002
November 28, 2008 - 6:48pm
#36
More vegetables in Netherlands? Certainly less than in Mediterranean Europe, and a lot of the veg is grown in greenhouses and not exceptionally tasty. But probably less junk than in the US. Also far greater income equality (despite persistent problems), health and social services etc. And people cycle more than they drive.

martin dufresne
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Joined: Dec 24 2005
November 28, 2008 - 6:54pm
#37

I have read that the exceptional height of Netherlanders is due to the amount of dairy products in their diet.

Maybe it also has to do with most of them living a few metres below sea level... Survival value... wooden shoes...


Papal Bull
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Joined: Oct 7 2004
November 28, 2008 - 6:59pm
#38

So, they intend to walk on the water should they not be tall enough to adapt to keeping to the shallows and having their heads above the water?


martin dufresne
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Joined: Dec 24 2005
November 28, 2008 - 6:59pm
#39

5'10" average height for men??? You mean I'm... short? You've got to be kidding...

That's like casually mentioning in mixed company that average penis length is eleven inches... surefire way to make the guys look crestfallen...


lagatta
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Joined: Apr 17 2002
November 28, 2008 - 7:04pm
#40
Yes, they certainly do consume a lot of dairy products. I can't drink cow's milk, but when over there can buy delicious goat's milk gouda and other cheeses much cheaper than here. And I have seen non-pregnant adults drinking milk, which is very rare elsewhere in Europe except for café-au-lait at breakfast. Dairy counters are large in supermarkets, even small ones, with yoghourt, vla (a type of liquidy pudding which people have at breakfast, all kinds of cheeses, milks, fermented milks etc. None of which has much to do with lookism except that one smiles after eating nice cheese. And they are so bloody tall I get a crook in my neck looking at them. Very Amsterdamish day here in Montréal today. Not cold, grey, drizzly almost-snow, but perfectly cyclable. And I did.

martin dufresne
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Joined: Dec 24 2005
November 29, 2008 - 12:13am
#41
I went riding too, down to Chinatown for some mongolian fondue and fiery conversation. Miam...

lagatta
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Joined: Apr 17 2002
November 29, 2008 - 10:31am
#42
Oh, that sounds nice. Cyclable today too. Will do, as we may well be getting some serious snow (yecch) on Monday. Yes, that is actually AVERAGE height for men. And remember that there are immigrants and their children from "shorter" countries - Indonesians aren't typically very tall, for example, though the Dutch-born children once again are taller than their foreign-born parents. Despite the wartime privations, I've seen an astonishing number of tall older people, men and women. Six-foot women are not uncommon, neither are two-metre men (no, I'm NOT talking about penis size). Good place for tall people to buy jeans and long-sleeved shirts. Hey, they've announced rain instead of snow for Monday now! One can hope.

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