Harper cancels Earth Day

LONDON, UK -- "Canada, among all the advanced countries, is best positioned to prosper and profit from the ecological crisis," announced Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper shortly after arriving for the opening of the G20 summit.

"Earth Day is a pessimistic and -- frankly -- socialistic concept, and we would rather focus on the many causes for optimism in the 21st century," explained Harper. "Some people see the Arctic ice cap as half melted, but I prefer to see a new shipping route as half freed up."

"The only thing we have to fear about climate change is fear of climate change itself."

Canada's Conservative government, said Harper, will be introducing a motion in Parliament to cancel the April 22 celebration of Earth Day...

Comments

Submitted by Catchfire on April 1, 2009 - 10:31am.

I heard that to celebrate, Harper is booking an end of the month stay in the Hotelicopter. [3]

Submitted by Maysie on April 1, 2009 - 10:34am.

Okay, you had me until "Oil Sands Day".

Submitted by Caissa on April 1, 2009 - 10:34am.

Good April Fool feature.

Submitted by Boom Boom on April 1, 2009 - 11:00am.

Good riddance. Earth Day was a communist plot to sap our precious bodily fluids.

Submitted by Loretta on April 1, 2009 - 10:45am.

Brilliant and unfortunately, not far off the mark.

Submitted by Pride for Red D... on April 1, 2009 - 12:40pm.

For a moment when I read the title I though you where serious ! Then I remembered it was April Fools day.

Submitted by Frmrsldr on April 1, 2009 - 9:57pm.

Harper's designs on Alberta's tar sands are a capitalist plot to sap mother earth's precious bodily fluids.

Submitted by fogbrella on April 2, 2009 - 4:13pm.

thank Jason Kenney's Lord that April Fool's Day is OVER

and we can quit foolin' around, and focus on critical issues -

I'll start: Harper is SUCH a dweeb - lacking any masculine traits whatsoever - continuously lying to the people of Canada - and the world - about what's what

He's said, publicly, that "invading Iraq was a mistake", when he knows goddammed-well (unless he's a complete idiot) that, in FACT, the attack, invasion, destruction and good-as-permanent occupation, of Iraq, was intentionally undertaken - following PNAC blueprints, practically to-the-letter

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uT7kcAu4i8' [11]

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-36916906795057218 [12]

he's a liar and Jason Kenney and Stockwell Day and M. Ignatieff are right in there with him, all lying thru their teeth because why?

there's the question

WHY LIE? is their actual goal SO outrageous that lying, therefore, is warranted? or what?

ttp://www.larouchepub.com/other/2003/3011profile_strauss.html [13]

Submitted by Michelle on April 2, 2009 - 4:42pm.

The best part about this is that I've been hearing from other rabble staff that a few people actually really believed it (not having read it all the way through to the bottom) and have been filled with indignation over it on Facebook and elsewhere.

I thought the "tells" in the article were pretty obvious (perhaps a little too obvious?) but I guess they weren't for some people. Hee hee!

Submitted by It's Me D on April 2, 2009 - 4:59pm.

The joke was good enough, but post #8 topped it!

Submitted by fogbrella on April 2, 2009 - 5:46pm.

It's Me D wrote:

The joke was good enough, but post #8 topped it!

thanks?

but, as post #8 was made on April 2nd, it was assumed, by the author, that you'd realize it was NO JOKE...

anyway, I actually thought for a nano-second or two, when I read it - YESTERDAY - that the story was, in fact, true - but that's because absolutely NOTHING this government did would surprise me.

barring George Galloway from speaking here? as if he presented some danger?

no discussion - no debate...

so, like, anything goes, apparently

therefore it's April Fools Day EVERYDAY!

Submitted by Jerk Jaws on April 9, 2009 - 3:19pm.

After seeing Galloway on the Hour, I'm not sure what he had to say of educational value would not be trumped by his pompousness. Example: he said he knows everything he needs to about Muslim issues, even though he had never represented any in the British Parliament until the last election and has never lived for any length of time in the Middle East. Yes, Mr Galloway stands for social democratic values, but his controversial methods (leading to his not being allowed in Canada, and we are not the first country to do this) overshadow his message.

Happy Easter