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Canada is keeping its sanctions in place against Iran, standing firm against the dire threat of peace between Iran and the rest of the world. Foreign Affairs Minister Rob Nicholson said Canada “will continue to judge Iran by its actions not its words.” Interesting, considering that’s the opposite of how we judge the U.S. It’s also interesting because it’s not true.

If we judged Iran by its actions we’d consider that all 16 U.S. intelligence agencies have concluded Iran abandoned its nuclear weapons program in 2003 and has built a total of zero nuclear bombs. And if we had a memory longer than a few weeks, we might even see Iran’s nuclear posture as a defensive one. They’ve been continuously threatened with attack by the U.S. — which is an international crime — threats worded as “keeping all options on the table,” a table big enough to hold the 5,000 American nuclear warheads. Probably a sturdy oak one.  

The United States propped up a torturing dictator in Iran for decades. They helped Saddam Hussein in his invasion of Iran that killed hundreds of thousands of its citizens. They shot down a civilian Iranian airliner in 1988, killing 290 people, then gave the commander who did it the Legion of Merit. If they did all that to us, Joe wouldn’t have said “I am Canadian” he would have said “Death to America.”

Scott Vrooman

Scott has written and performed comedy for TV (Conan, Picnicface, This Hour Has 22 Minutes), radio (This is That), and the web (Vice, Funny or Die, College Humor, The Toronto Star, The Huffington Post,...