The Buffalo Beast has published their annual '50 Most Loathsome People in America' list. Read it at http://buffalobeast.com/134/50mostloathsome2008.html
You are number 43:
Charges: You think it’s your patriotic duty to spend money
you don’t have on crap you don’t need. You think Hillary lost because
of sexism, when it’s actually because she’s just a bad liar. You think
Iraq is better off now than before we invaded, and don’t understand why
they’re so ungrateful. You think Tim Russert was a great journalist. You’re
hopping mad about an auto industry bailout that cost a squirt of piss
compared to a Wall Street heist of galactic dimensions, due to a housing
crash you somehow have blamed on minorities. It took you six years to
figure out what a tool Bush is, but you think Obama will make it all better.
You deem it hunky dory that we conduct national policy debates via 8-second
clips from “The View.” You think God zapped humans into existence a few
thousand years ago, although your appendix and wisdom teeth disagree.
You like watching vicious assholes insult each other on TV. You support
gun rights, because firing one gives you a chubby. You cuddle falsehoods
and resent enlightenment. You think the fact that 43% of whites could
stomach voting for an incredibly charismatic and eloquent light-skinned
black guy who was raised by white people means racism is over. You think
progressive taxation is socialism. 1 in 100 of you are in jail, and you
think it should be more. You are shallow, inconsiderate, afraid, brand-conscious,
sedentary, and totally self-obsessed. You are American.
Exhibit A: You’re more upset by Miley Cyrus’s glamour
shots than the fact that you are a grown adult who is upset about Miley
Sentence: Invaded and occupied by Canada; all military
units busy overseas without enough fuel to get back.