To the folks who knew Hephaestion

That's terrible to hear.  Condolences to his family and friends.

Oh my God. I counted Heph as a friend and staunch ally. And larger than life. He will be remembered.

 tehanu....thank you for your kindness at letting us know....

 Hephaestion, you went just as cool as you lived, in your sleep, the best way...

Regards to his family and friends, I am sure he will be much missed, and I know I will misss his keeping up with the religious bigots and hyprocits thread at en masse.

This is very sad news. Like Michelle, I will miss his voice during my regular, quiet visits to enMasse. Thank you, Tehanu, for letting us know. And love to the grieving at eM.

Several years ago, a babbler wrote of being depressed and wanting to "pass on life". Naturally, everyone was concerned. [url=http://rabble.ca/babble/introductions-and-frequently-asked-questions/goo... is what Heph wrote[/url], if you want a little insight to who he was:

Quote:

I am on the same clock as you (11:35 right now, PT), and I will be up *most* of the night (hey, I'm a night owl...) By the time I crash, the east coast will be coming back on. There will be *someone* here all night, if you want to talk.

And you can still PM me if you'd like. Like I said, I'm up all night, and I wouldn't mind at all.

We really do give a damn, buddy. And we're here for you.

And we're here for you, Heph, old buddy.

This is so incredibly sad. I know it is selfish, but he made me laugh so many times, I already want that particular kind of laughter back.

Heph was one of a kind, one of my favourite posters back in the day.

I  met and learned about Hephaestion through Enmass, he was a treasure for the ``rainbow`` queer community. Above all, he was a very kind and generous person who would reach out to those in difficulties, he certainly did with me.  It was truly an honour to have met him online. He was my inspiration and I am very sad to learn of his passing. His words wont be forgotten, nor would he be forgotten. R.I.P

Thanks laine for sharing that.

Heph, gives even after he has moved on to life in the spirit.

Thanks Tehanu for letting the babble community know about this sad loss.

I haven't interacted online with Heph for a number of years, but I remember many online babble exchanges that we had.

As an infrequent EM lurker I was always impressed by his continued energy to post links from far and wide regarding so many aspects of being out and queer, both triumphs and fails, from around the world.

Unionist wrote:

Oh my God. I counted Heph as a friend and staunch ally. And larger than life. He will be remembered.

Indeed, I share this sentiment. A loss.

I am so sorry and shocked to read this news. Heph's passionate commitment to justice and his open heart were unmistakable in everything he wrote, and he was a writer for sure -- I think he'd like to be remembered for that.

It was very thoughtful of Heph's friends to get in touch with his online communities. Thanks and condolences to them.

This is indeed sad news. I will remember him as someone with a big heart and great courage.

I am very saddened. Hephaestion was one of the most fair-minded, peace, justice and equality loving amongst fellow babblers and I always enjoyed his contributions. I froze upon reading this news of his departure, my eyes welled up upon reading his words as posted by Unionist.

(Thank you Tehanu for letting us know).

So sad to hear this. He was such a smart, decent, and funny guy.

RIP Heph.

I remember what babble was like, in Heph's time, before the troubles, and it seems now like a land called Honalee.

With thanks to [url=http://enmasse.ca/forums/viewtopic.php?p=232890&sid=d1fa675fdae1c9bc8f6b... Demorney over at EnMasse[/url] - reproduced from [url=http://www.valleyvoice.ca/contenteditor_files/ValleyVoice100616web.pdf]the Valley Voice[/url]:

Quote:

[center]Mourning Rob Riley...[/center]

One of my dearest friends died last week. Rob Riley was a character, and will be remembered as such. In many ways he was a great man. Intellectually gifted, magnanimous of spirit and possessed of a keen sense of humour.

Like many great spirits, he had a number of character flaws as well. He was a hopeless alcoholic. As soon as he ever got any money, he would start drinking, and wouldn’t stop until the money was gone. He rarely bathed, and lived in squalor. He chain-smoked hand-rolled cigarettes for most of his too-short life. He was stubborn and impertinent.

Rob was a month older than me, and we knew each other since university days. He came for a visit shortly after I landed in Rosebery, and ended up staying for most of the next decade and a half. He was living at my log house when it burnt down, and moved into a room in the basement of the new house when it was built. He lived there for several years, before moving into a trailer on my property. It was there that he died.

We worked together on our university newspaper, The Quill. He came to
join me on my first community newspaper, The Souris Valley Echo. We’ve
published books, newspapers and magazines together. When Jan & I bought
the Valley Voice, he became our first production manager.

The biggest project that we ever took on together was putting the Sandon
Museum back together after two-thirds of the collection had been taken by
a disgruntled member of the historical society. We worked long hours for
weeks that summer, putting together the interpretation that still adorns the
walls. He wanted to tell a story, he told me. So he edited my writings, fitting
them into his vision of the history of the place. He gathered artifacts from
hither and yon, and incorporated them into our displays. Because we were
both newspapermen, we broke the history of the place into stories. The walls
of that museum were our paste-up boards that summer, and we reveled in
all of that space.

Rob was a complicated man. He had a low sense of self-worth, yet was
always defending the rights of others. He refused to take a disability pension
for decades, despite having had a leg amputated as a child. Too proud. He
was a socialist, a gay-rights advocate and a tireless defender of disabled
persons. He contributed thoughtful posts to a large number of on-line journals, progressive think-tanks and discussion groups.

I loved him dearly, and miss him very much.

Dan Nicholson, publisher

I didn't know much about Hephaestion's life, but from what that post said, these traditional folk lyrics seem the most accurate tribute one could pay:

1) He Was A Friend of Mine

He Was A Friend of Mine

Everytime I think about him now

Lord, I just can't keep from crying.

He Was A Friend Of Mine

2) He died on the road

He died on the road

He never had enough money

To pay his room and board

He died on the road

3) I stole away and cried

I stole away and cried

'Cause I never had too much money

And I never been quite satisfied

I stole away and cried.

4) He never done no wrong

He never done no wrong

A thousand miles from home

And he never harmed no one

He was a friend of mine

5) He was a friend of mine

He was a friend of mine

Everytime I think about him now

Lord, I just can't keep from crying

He was a friend of mine.

...Rest now, Heph.  Your suffering days are over.

Amidst all the chaos of these times, I thought it would be appropriate to stop for a bit and remeber an important time in the history of this online community.

On June 6, 2010, former babbler and founding member of EnMasse, Roberto Reily (known to us at the time as Hephaestion) died in his sleep. He was such a pillar of this community, and I know that he has been missed. I've thought about him in the decade since, and all that has gone on. The rise and fall of the Decter-Hrist mayoral administration in Brandon. Arab Spring. Occupy Wall Street. Stephen Harper majority, followed by Justin Trudeau. Black Lives Matter, George Floyd, and the current uprisings against police brutality. Gerald Stanley and Colten Boushie. Tina Fontaine and missing Aboriginal women and girls. Climate strikes and Greta Thunberg. Ireland and Australia voting for marriage equality. President Trump and the rise of the Sanders movement. The rise of Brian Pallister in Manitoba. The defeat of the Liberal government in his home province of BC. The fall of Pope Bennedict and the rise of Pope Francis. I wonder what he would say if he was with us to comment on all of that.

Likewise, many others of our community have moved on to be with him since then. Know that you are all in our hearts and minds, and we hope you are all having a good time babbling on the Other Side.

Look what I found in the WayBack Machine!!
 https://web.archive.org/web/20111027110845/http://enmasse.ca/forums/viewtopic.php?t=13527

This is so sad. The WayBack Machine has preserved Heph's post about his illness, and our reactions.

https://web.archive.org/web/20111027130354/http://enmasse.ca/forums/viewtopic.php?t=11457

laine lowe wrote:

Wow, that EM thread brings back memories as does this. Thanks for reviving it, Aristotleded.

I too often wonder what skdadl, Heph, Boom Boom, pogge and Croghan would have made of the events of these recent years.

Don't forget pencil_skirt.

laine lowe wrote:

If I recall she was on her bike and was hit by a car.

She was on foot, but yes, she was hit by a car.

The impaired driver who killed her was going the wrong way down a one-way street.